By Yael Lavie, Sky News Senior Middle East Producer, in south east Turkey.

"They told me that there is a gun in the house. They said: 'We are going to kill you tonight. You have seen how we killed your sister in law. You will die the same way.'"

Aisha had every reason to believe her husband's family when they said that. She had witnessed her sister in law killed a few years back.

Her crime was being the target of harassing phone calls by her husband's cousin.

He claimed to have fallen in love with her. Although she had not returned his affection and even complained about it to the family, they decided she had to die: what may seem absurd to westerners is, in South-East Turkey, a reality.

Telling her story in a Diyarbakir women's shelter called 'Kamer', Aisha - we are not revealing her real name - now smiles.

It is in the past and she has survived it. She fled that night and eventually found her way to Kamer. The women's organization began a slow and dangerous process of negotiating between Aisha and her family to ensure her life.

Luckily for Aisha her husband was supportive. Her life was spared, providing both she and her husband left the village.

If they were to return it is doubtful Aisha would last a day.

If they knew she had talked to the press she would also be in danger again. 

Few women are as lucky as Aisha in South East Turkey.

Honour crimes have long been a common practice in this part of the world.

Recently they have evolved in a disturbing way. To help its application to join the EU, Turkey tightened laws against honour killings.

But that caused a different problem: a rise in honour suicides. To avoid being punished, families are forcing women to kill themselves.

The problem for Turkish authorities investigating honour suicides is that they are cloaked in a centuries old code of secrecy - as was the case for Halimeh Baytkin, an 18 year old girl who was found dead in a poor neighbourhood of Diyarbakir in 2005.

We tracked down her uncle who gave her family's version of events: she watched television, got depressed and killed herself he told us.

Authorities believe her family forced her to kill herself because she had dishonoured them simply by having a boyfriend. But noone has been prosecuted for her death.

Many honour crimes are punishment for trivial 'offences' such as wearing jeans, talking to a boy or even being looked at by a man in a wrong way.

Women's groups say three or four women die in suspicious circumstances every month in south east Turkey, and those are only the cases that are reported.

The Turkish government claims it is cracking down on honour crimes under pressure from Europe to improve human rights, but it may take decades to overcome this ancient bloody tradition.

At the moment there's strong evidence their efforts are being tragically counterproductive.

See more on this story by clicking here

Comments

[Major Turkiye 12 Dec 2007 21:27:40]

So sad Sky news is getting just like a few other newspapers.. İts that time of year again is it...? lets have yet another go at Turkiye..

I am English man Married to a Turk, I for one am sick to death of these cheap attacks on Turkiye dont you people have anything else to report.

The majority of real Turks are sick to death of the E.U playing games..

Sky news do a real report and ask them.

[Nevada. Leicester 6 Dec 2007 08:02:27]

If people from other cultures and non-western religions wish to live in this country, I believe they should abandon their barbaric practices, superstitions, and belief systems at the point of arrival. Abandon what they knew before and embrace the opportunities here fully and without any 'baggage'.

[john london 19 Nov 2007 12:21:36]

adem, belgium 16 Nov 2007 21:53:48
I am sorry that I am not able to follow your logic with regard to the killings in 1888 by an unknown killer - code named 'Jack the Ripper' and the stoning of that woman in Iraq. Killers are in every society and are usually people that are either mentally disturbed or simply wicked and evil and get their pleasures out such acts. The stoning of that woman in Iraq was carried out on religious and outdated cultural beliefs. The act of stoning was a decree by the people and not the act of a single individual. Therefore, please stop trying to draw a parallel between criminal acts and acts brought about by religious and cultural differences.

[john london 19 Nov 2007 12:04:14]

wisdom, london 16 Nov 2007 20:48:44
I have read your points of view on the subject matter of cultural differences between the UK and the middle east and a large part of Africa and the Indian sub-continent. It is truly a sad state of events that you do not live up to your chosen alias of'Wisdom'! Firstly, the women in Britain have equality in every walk of life can the same be said of the middle east, Africa or Indian sub-continent. Please do not let your blind hatre of this country cloud your view points. If this country is so bad why is it that people from other countries are flooding in both legally and illegally. Can you say the same of the middle east, Africa or Indian sub-continent. By simple request to all who think that Britain is such a barbaric country please feel free to leave at anytime. There is an old saying ' Do not bite the hand that feeds you'

[Lisa - UK 19 Nov 2007 11:07:37]

My husband recently travelled to Libya with work. He told me what an amazing experience it turned out to be, the people were courteous, kind, gentle and very respectful of one another. He said they showed incredible hospitality to him and his colleagues. We discussed that there is now such a strong belief in society that the muslim faith is extremist and because of that we don't acknowledge all the many good and decent people from this culture.

We also reflected on the society that the people in Libya share and my husband told me about the peaceful, alturist nature of the people he met. He felt saddened by what must seem to be our materialistic, hedonistic western lifestyle. This is what is reflected in our media and our crime rates.
There is certainly room for improvement here in the UK and we should not cast the first stone in a moral arena.

But, I like many balk at honour killings or suicides. There is no place in any society for this method of control (or any method of control) It is dishonourable to take the life of another person and anything our government can do to put pressure on cultures still exercising this 'tradition' should be fully explored. It is a shame that the actions of a few can reflect negatively on the majority.

[julie uk 18 Nov 2007 04:03:59]

As I Read these views all I see is Different people from different places, stating it's fault of them here or them there. I think comments that were asked about was suicide killings, at the end of the day, the facts are simple, every one is human, we all have rights, for one person to take a live or force someone else to take their's is wrong regardless the reason, male and female should be treated equal worldwide. we all eat, sleep and breathe.

[adem, belgium 16 Nov 2007 21:53:48]

John,may I say that you as a fair person don't generalize matters and establish any link between that kind of bloody&criminal acts and whole people of turkey and its eu membership story; otherwise one may say:"what a coincidence...jack the ripper of whitechapel/london in 1888 was a brit and now suspect of the murders of Vicky&Dinah...is there a cultural or any other reason of those killings in Britain"

[wisdom, london 16 Nov 2007 20:48:44]

I think John is very confused and doesnt really understand what he is talking about. As according to him, the murders in london and belguim cannot be compared to "the barbaric act of cultural conformity". In what way? any form of murder is barbaric ok. Wherever it takes place, its clear you have a very colonist attitude, and you speak of modernity. if anyone is living in outdated fashion it appears it is you.

Before you commence on joining a discourse, get your facts straight. As it seems like the only thing your propagating is the ridiclous view of the how only the west is 'civilised'.

Its pretty clear every nation has social and cultural issues. Yours is no better, every aspect of Britain part of britain seems to be inflicted with crimes and murder and from my knowledge domestic violence and spousal murder is becoming quite a problem, among the indiginous population, so dont say otherwise ok. Moreover you speak of other cultures treating women as 2nd rate citizens. Is that why women in the UK are the most vulnerable group economically and socially.

So before you start pointing the finger, take a closer look in the nation you live in, instead reading about the little you know and have no experience of ever being in and understanding other cultures. Being a mere observer without any resourceful experience doesnt account for much. Good day.

[Ana, Lisbon 16 Nov 2007 15:47:04]

"Islam in its true essence is very similar in its teachings to the many other religions - such as Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, however, certain sections of followers of Islam have took it upon themselves to distort the teachings to accommodate their own perverted and evil minds" I would have to disagree because ALL RELIGIONS distort the teachings, that's why religion is the base of so many countless wars. Religion is supposed to preach peace instead it preaches "hate those that are different and treat women like second class people"...Ok maybe Buddhism doesn't.

[john london 16 Nov 2007 10:52:35]

adem, belgium 15 Nov 2007 22:18:49
The stoning of that young woman in Iraq was brought about by rigid and outdated religious and cultural beliefs.
The murder in London and no doubt in your country is usually brought about by criminally minded people and not motivated by religion or culture. Therefore you cannot draw a parallel conclusion between the two killings. Islam in its true essence is very similar in its teachings to the many other religions - such as Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, however, certain sections of followers of Islam have took it upon themselves to distort the teachings to accommodate their own perverted and evil minds. But the greater sin/default lies with the people who blindly follow the teachings of radicals and in doing so have brought the good teachings of Islam into disrepute. Therefore, please do not draw a comparision between the killing in London or Belgium, with the barbaric act of cultural conformity.

[adem, belgium 15 Nov 2007 22:18:49]

as some readers rightly mentioned, this is a bloody tradition among few&poor kurdish families...it has nothing to do with turks and other kurds and islam,recall the young yazdi(not muslim) kurdish woman in north iraq stoned to death recently because she had fallen in love with a sunni muslim man,I really wonder opinion of john as to the murder of young woman in uk currently under investigation and religion of the suspect..

[john london 15 Nov 2007 12:49:31]

Posted by: darknight, italy 14 Nov 2007 18:54:17
Well Well! it would seem that I have hit a raw nerve, from your ranting. Firstly, I did not comment on your colour or religion. Secondly, the remark of being a bigot, is a figment of your brainwashed imagination. Thirdly, I am not generalising, but stating facts that exist and if you really were honest with yourself you will see that all of the trouble in the middle east and other parts of the world are mainly caused by brainwashed muslims.
Further more how dare you assume that my experiences and observations are subjective, because I am not alone in my comments about Islamic extremists and again if you were not so wrapped up in your own warped thoughts you will see that the majority of the sane world disagree with your idealogy.
Please, take a look at the world map and you will see that the biggest part of Turkey is not in Europe, and I for one would not like 77+ million muslims(whether fanatical or moderate)being part of a modern thinking Europe. The old saying of 'East is East and West is West and the twain shall never meet' is more valid today than ever before.

[darknight, italy 14 Nov 2007 18:54:17]

Posted by: john london 14 Nov 2007 10:57:03
Again John jumping the gun and being assumptious. you have no knowledge of my colour or creed, and what I was born into, yet seem to think you have the knowledge of things you clearly dont. How dare you assume what race or religion I am, you are not in a position to do that.
By the way your personal experiences are very sujective, there is no objectivity in them, so very contradictory statements in the same sentence.

Quite frankly why Turkey would want to join Europe is beyond me, because of such democracy and free spech. Its a shame that, that this alone is not a hinderance for the murders, violence, racism and the prevalance of child abuse that exists in your nation.

Is that the civilisation your so proud to defend?

And who spoke of gaining sympathy or understanding, I am very aware that bigots such as yourself will always exist, and quite franky i dont give a damn.

However unfortunately I have allowed myself to come to your base level by engaging with you.

As others have rightly pointed out, this was a discussion about the tragic circumstances some individuals live in, not for some unkind and heartless individuals such as yourself to make pernicious and unjustified remarks about your picture of the world.

By the way, if as you belief that all muslims are potentially terrorists. I think that if there were over a billion people across the world willing to blow themselves up, this would be a very unsafe world.

Its a terrible shame that individuals such as yourself generalise a minority into a majority.

I may be wearing rose tinted glasses, but its a shame that you have such a narrow and myopic view of the world and its inhabitants.

[Ana, Lisbon 14 Nov 2007 18:03:54]

Stop calling each other ignorants. We all know what the Qu'ran preaches: love, peace, etc. But we also know that that is not what most muslims do(bombing, forced suicide, claiming others are infidels,etc)at least that's what they show us. So if there are muslims that are disgusted by the extremists behaviour than do something about it! Demonstrate that disgust, let the world know that you exist! You can't blame us for thinking that muslim are, to say the least, problematic.

[Justin, Buckinghamshire 14 Nov 2007 17:27:24]

Turkey’s application for entry into the European Union deserves careful consideration. Whilst Turkey is not strictly part of Europe, I am not convinced that all of the current EU members are. We should start building bridges with Muslim countries and the EU may be a good place to start. We cannot allow an ‘us and them’ mentality to set in. Turkey are keen to join, and understandably hope to benefit from membership. They would also bring a new dimension to proceedings. We stand to learn a lot from each other, and maybe understand each other more in the process. There are many undesirable practices around the globe which deserve condemnation and being closer to these issues may make change easier to influence.

[john london 14 Nov 2007 11:52:23]

Barbara, The Netherlands 14 Nov 2007 11:21:14
I have read your comments with great interest. Yes the main teachings of the quoran are of peace and tolerance and no one has the right to kill another - very similar to the teachings of Christianity. However, if the good muslims continue to close their eyes to the situation and allow the radicals to control their religion then we all know the outcome. Therefore, tell your muslims friends to lobby against such extremists elements and take a stand to stamp out the Ayatollahs and Imams that preach hatred and terrorism and outdated practices. The only way the good muslims are ever going to get back their religion is to stand up and be counted, because only the muslims can change the face of extreme Islam and not the west. The Kurdish people,are also muslim and if the suicide honour killings is just another form of honour killing surely this is not only tolerated by the Islamic clergy but by other muslims. Depending upon Europe/ European community to bring pressure on Turkey to curb these practices will result in Europe being blamed for interference and thus spawn a new wave of violence from the radical factions of Islam. Muslims' problems can only be solved by muslims, and not the rest of the world.

[Barbara, The Netherlands 14 Nov 2007 11:21:14]

I read this article yesterday and today spoke about it to my Turkish friends. I was told that a girl would only be asked to take her own life (and this only happens in a remote part of eastern Turkey where they still live under the Sharia law)if she had actually had an affair with another man outside of her marriage. No way would this happen if she had done nothing herself. She wouldn't have disgraced her family at all.
The problem is that many people think that the majority of Muslims are terrorists and that is completely wrong. I know lots of Muslims who are disgusted with the fundamentalists in their own folk. These perfectly good Muslims are often looked down on by the ordinary population in European countries and I find it quite disgusting.
The terrorists on the other hand do not live the way the Koran tells them to - if they did, terrorism wouldn't exist!
Everybody should get to know other cultures and try to understand what the real differences are and respect them.
Communication is the only solution to all unrest in the world.
All people are people.

By the way, the rest of Turkey no longer has the Sharia law - it was changed when Ata Turk took over the country years ago.

[john london 14 Nov 2007 10:57:03]

darknight, italy 13 Nov 2007 22:43:18
Whenever things do not go the way muslims want they tend to blame all and sundry. Islam has been in existance as long as Christianity, yet it holds all its followers in the dark ages. Just take a look around the muslim world and see how barbaric laws and customs are still practiced. It would seem that you have sought safe haven in Italy where you are afforded freedom of speech and a modern life style, I wonder why you have forsaken your country of origin? Therefore before you rant about people not understanding the muslims please wake up and take of your rose coloured glasses, because unless individuals like yourself are willing to change there is very little hope of gaining sympathy or understanding from people. By the way I do not write out of hatre or ignorance but through personal experiences and observation. I will again say that Turkey should not be part of Europe, firstly, because only a very tiny part of Turkey is in Europe whilst the bulk of the country is not. Just look at your world map.

[Amanda, Derby 13 Nov 2007 22:54:32]

my god, there are some seriously ignorant people here! My husband is Turkish and like him, I get so frustrated with these stories. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NO DIFFERENT TO THE ASIANS IN OUR COUNTRY - YES YOUR PERFECT UK! We hear about these honour killings/suicides all the time in this bloody country - this is such irresponable journalism - you are talking of a handful of cases in the country the same size as France x 4 - infact, may of these comments sound like they come from the mouth of the French President. I have never read such a load of nonsense - oh and by the way, these are Kurds carrying out these and other traditions - imagine how you would feel if a say, Spanish newspaper wrote all about the UK and its honour killings/suicides - you would be the first to jump up and say "no no they were kurds/pakistanis/iranians - its exactly the same - which is why its so pathetic.

[darknight, italy 13 Nov 2007 22:43:18]

Re: John London: “Then please explain why 90% of all terrorists are Muslim?”

I wondering what this particular forum has got to do with suicide bombers, again someone’s blind ignorance and self evident prejudice is distorting your point, if there was one.

I’ve nothing to explain to you, if you’re so curious, id advise you to do your own research, instead of following what you read in the papers, and think you some expert on the issue. Maybe if individuals such as yourself didn’t take the high moral ground you would have more insight in the complex nature of international politics and conflict and actually mention it in the appropriate domain, instead of finding any random space to rant about your own prejudicial attitude and clear lack of understanding.

After all we are all entitled to our opinions, something I am sure you hold in great reverence, so please to sound so begrudging and full of hatred.

[Noah 13 Nov 2007 21:46:57]

All these argumetns about Islam are beside the point. read the article; its about women. Women being killed or forced to kill themselves. Arguing about Turjey and Islam is a debate but regardless to who r what is to blame can we please remember this is about individuals, its about women dying and the question we should ask ( if you read the stoy in full) is what can be done, Criticism aside at the end of the day women, individuals are dying - tshould that not be the main - as naive as that may sound - rather than

[Khalid 13 Nov 2007 20:16:36]

Yet another tragic side to how the very teachings are misconstrued as all "Lauren Hill" wants to do is live the life she was gifted with by nature. So "Forgive Them Father" and put a happy smile on everyones face.

[d, london 13 Nov 2007 19:21:50]

As a muslim born and working in the UK, I think I better tell my parents they're not quite fulfilling their apparent roles in society, as a responder so eloquently highlighted, "muslims are funny, they come to our country..plan suicide attacks etc.." These rants highlight the attitudes that are PARTLY responsible for the isolation and ghettoisation of immature, ignorant young males who are the most likely to be brainwashed by fundmentalists, in the name of religion. Yes!! most suicide bombers are muslim and lots of deplorable things happen in apparently "muslim countries", but by marking out an entire population of people who share this religion (which includes many many countries and as equally as many cultures )can only feul the unacceptance and marginalisation, that suicide recruiters prey on. This issue of honour killings is largely cultural and occurs as wide as far as India and Africa, with muslims and non muslims alike and is due to the age old issue of; ignorance, male power and outdated cultural practice. As for turkey joining the EU, I quite like the faux designer gear and cheap food, but surely its acceptance should be discussed taking into account all of the issues; economic as well as social?

[Joanne, UK 13 Nov 2007 17:59:48]

All those people saying that these 'honour' suicides are a reason why Turkey should not be allowed to accede to the European Union are missing an important point: the growth of 'honour' suicide is just the reflection of the decline of 'honour' killing. The decline in 'honour' killing is in direct response to EU pressure upon Turkey to properly criminalise and prosecute so-called 'honour' crime. Ruling out Turkish membership is effectively abandonning these women and girls to their families and giving up Europe's greatest opportunity for postive influence on women's lives.

[Dr Azhar Kuala Lumpur 13 Nov 2007 15:14:28]

This is just traditional societies request not from religion believe, please be more open minded to solve this problem, dont let our sisters' been sacrify for stupid traditions, not in one words in Quran show to ask for honour killing.Please stop it.